Zombies 2: Zombie types

Posted: July 15, 2011 in Zombies
Tags: , , , , , , ,

ok you know who you need to keep you safe in a zombie outbreak but what kind of zombies will you meet here’s a helpful guide to show you when to fight when to hide and when to get the “#### out of Dodge”

Type 1: The Romero

as seen in night of the living dead as well as all the of the dead franchise and almost every zombie movie made before the 1990’s

A Romero Zombie

The Romero is the first and most common form of zombie, originated due to some sort of space radiation possibly? it’s cause is never fully explained, being slow, dimwitted and weak it is easy to beat with nothing but a brick or shovel and should be easily accounted for although must be decapitated and burnt to assure elimination,

Zombie Rating: easy and plentiful good to practice on.

Threat Rating: Mostly harmless untill in large groups, considered as dangerous as star-trek fans.

Advice: grab your chainsaw and have some fun!

Type 2: The Runner

as seen in: zombie land and any movie where zombies that run were need to further the plot

 

The Runner

the “Zombie land” is very similar to the Romero except faster and slightly uglier, it is also more resistant to normal non killing

attacks, caused by cratoean virus or “mad cow”

Zombie rating: best suited for comedy

Threat rating: low about as dangerous as insurance sales men

Advice: grab your ridiculous weapon and get blasting/bashing/chopping or all three

Type 3: The Rager

As seen in 28 days/weeks later

The rager

The rager is caused by an experimental rage virus unleashed by science and hippies in a horrible frenzy that makes them vomit blood run and be generally nasty

Zombie ratting : not technically zombies but I’ll let it slide

Threat rating: high while stupid they are as strong and fast as any normal person

Advice: hide and wait for them to starve

Type 4: The mutant

as seen in any zombie video game and the resident evil movies ect.

The mutant

comes in many different forms but is always hard to kill and has some kind of special ability/weapon will destroy planes run through walls and ignore other people once it decides it wants to kill you

Zombie ratting: while not technically a zombie still awesome very dangerous

Threat rating: extreme if you’re not a main character or have superpowers yourself watch out

Advice: hide, hide, hide as soon as you see it coming

Type 5: The Ultimate

The Ultimate Zombie

as seen in return of the living dead 1/2/3/4/5/ect

these zombies caused by some unknown experiment are unkillable the one in the picture was stored in acid for ten years if you cut off there head it will still bite you and the body will still attack you, burn them and the ash will get washed in the rain and revive long dead corpses even nukes don’t stop them, oh and did I mention there smart! smart enough to kill a cop then use his own radio to call for back up so they have more people to kill, they can talk and well they are the ultimate zombie.

Zombie rating: they will kill us all!

Threat rating: nukes don’t stop them do you need to ask!

Advice: get the #### out of dodge and by dodge i mean earth!

so there you go the answer to the question that has been plaguing your sleep for at least a nano second every night for the last day

Advertisements
Comments
  1. Let’s hope we never have to encounter the ultimate type!

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s